Hello South Sudan!

I've left the comforts of Ottawa to rejoin field life. Working in policy research is a different kind of challenging, and although I really appreciated the experience, I was beginning to become rather bored. It was really hard to break out of a programming mentality and focus on academia.

On a field research trip I realised - when interviewing NGOs and CSOs - that I was incredibly homesick for projects, and programs, and "doing things". This feeling translated into my work when I returned to Canada, leaving me desperate to get back to implementing and designing projects rather than researching policy alternatives. I needed to get back to there. Not necessarily "in the field", but back in that line of work.

Policy research is extremely important, and I have been so fortunate to have the experience, but there are so many people that are academically focused and would have killed for my job. I, on the other hand, saw it as a stepping stone to gaining experience in a niche area.

So I'm back with the old org. Back in the thick of it. No longer in the Middle East, but in East Africa.

Hello South Sudan!

What's it like doing humanitarian assistance in conflict affected contexts?

CBC's "The Current" had a half-hour documentary today looking at the experiences of three aid workers with Médicins Sans Frontières (MSF or Doctors Without Borders). You can listen to the podcast version here. Or go to the Current`s website to see past episodes.

What's there to do for fun in a refugee camp?

May not be the first thing you'd ask when you get there. But for children and youth in refugee/displacement camps (or in locations affected by conflict or natural disaster) the opportunity to let loose is an important part of retaining some of the "normal" in their lives, and thus caring for their psycho-social well being.



There are a lot of fantastic programs that promote play for children and youth. One of my favourites is Right to Play, an organisation that started in Canada running sports programs in conflict affected areas. They have moved now to training physed teachers as well, so the concept of play pervades that curriculum, in addition to running sports programs for kids. They rely heavily on dedicated volunteers to carry out the projects, and occasionally get a few olympians along the way to give their time.

There are other fantastic initiatives that I have seen that have been wildly successful in popularity amongst kids. I have seen great work done by circus schools in the West Bank. One of my favourites is Capoeira programs which kids, both boys and girls, seem to take to like a fish to water. Oragnisations such as Capoera Arabe and Bidna Capoeira have been running programs for Palestinian and Iraqi refugee children and youth. The program teaches children to dance capoeira, an Afro-Brazilian dance style, as well as the songs and instrumental accompaniments. The basic moves mimic martial arts, but there is no contact. The dance is about creativity, and designed by oneself, giving the dancer the opportunity to choose what they do next - it's not dictated by choreography. It may seem trivial, but an outlet to vent frustration through dance driven by ones own creativity gives an important elemental of control to that kid when many other things seem out of their hands. What is more, the program to my knowledge has attracted both girls and boys (but I am unsure about young women).

Youth often get left behind in aid - particularly in fragile areas. When they are focused on, it's out of fear that young men left idle may turn into a source of instability (scary scary youth bulge). There are very few well documented initiatives of programs aimed at young women - often left out of the youth sphere. Culturally they may not even be considered youth at all, with the passage from childhood to woman hood marked by menstruation, or early marriage/pregnancy. More creative solutions are needed to address this. And more youth-led initiatives should be developed.

PS: Guardian has a new site on international development. It says it has "the best ideas on the biggest challenges". That may be a bold, premature statement. However. At least it exists.

NGO's Pawns in Terrorism?

This is a pretty comprehensive- yet cynical view - of international NGO activities in conflict and post conflict areas from The New Republic. I wrote a post last May introducing the SPOT requirement on all US government funding in Iraq and Afghanistan (and possibly to be implemented in Somalia... and everywhere?!). It stands for Synchronized Predeployment and Operational Tracker This requirement requires all US contractors (including INGOs) to provide the US government and the military with the GPS location of all programs and the names, positions and nationalities of all staff so that the military can keep tabs on all activity and movement (including movement in, out and around the country).

There are some major points of concern here. The first is the close association this put INGOs in with the US military. It runs counter to a lot of impartial and neutral stances of many of the major players. Close association with the US government can put beneficiaries in danger of attack from non-us friendly actors. Secondly, it reduces the capacity of donors like USAID to collect information effectively. This has been highlighted by the GAO. I know that despite a concerted effort from NGO consortiums like InterAction, a few INGOs have signed contracts (whether they knew it was in there or not) which include SPOT. Contributing further to the bleak situation David Rieff paints.

A good point that is brought up in the article is the fact that in countries such as Afghanistan and Iraq, the goal is not really development but national security. The budgets are simply not high enough to actually conduct development per say. Moreover, one needs to look at the types of civil society and governance programs that are actually funded here. In Iraq, programs such as the Community Action Program (CAP) which was in its third incarnation during my time, was in all matter of fact a way for the government to provide lots of material stuff to communities so that they would not hate what is happening to the country - Despite what the NGO (or development company in some cases) intended it to be. Another gem included a 2 year nation-wide peacebuilding program (peace in Iraq... in 2 years!) that was intended to be a front for counter insurgency information.

I wouldn't go as far to say that NGOs are pawns. Many know exactly what is going on and fight it continuously with lobbying. In regards to SPOT it may actually work (inshallah). The US administration is reviewing how USAID operates and SPOT seems to be on the list for review after it was blasted by the GAO. However the cynicism is warranted.

The burn out...

Apparently my last post was on January 31 2010. Since then so many things have happened. Elections... (didn't care), Settlement Debacle in West Bank... (could have written a good post), Hiking Club in Kurdistan... (meh... it's fun).

Finally something did prompt me - its what I would call... the burn-out.

I wikipediaed burnout. I wikipedia everything. It states that "burnout is a psychological term for the experience of long-term exhaustion and diminished interest." This pretty much explains my general state for the past 2 months - possibly longer.

I think, well I know, it's an affliction that hits many people in the aid field (and probably a lot of other professions). A common complaint that is heard is how understaffed projects and offices are by NGOs, the one I work for is no exception. There is too much work, and in a lot of cases insufficient capacity to conduct high level programming that is expected of international NGOs and international organisations. This leads to staff who are consistently overworked with no end in site. A co-worker of mine calls it "Emergency Mode".

Although "Emergency Mode" compounded with a harsh environment may make matters worse, this affliction transcends location and even context. Because aid workers (and development workers) work in Emergency Mode all the time... Even when there isn't an emergency.

Iraq has many needs, and there are the occasional emergencies that pop up. The fact is however, it is no longer an Emergency Context (I’m sure people will debate that - but I stick by it). Large amounts of people are not in need en masse of direct and immediate humanitarian assistance. Particularly not in the KRG where I am based.

I have never worked in an actual emergency context where emergency mode is acceptable. I'm not sure if an emergency context makes emergency mode easier to sustain? However I do know that it is not sustainable in an non-emergency context. I'm proof.

Signs of burnout:
- Neglecting needs and interests
- Withdrawal from social activities (or in some cases acting out through social activities... often negative ones)
- Denial
- Change in behaviour (such as becoming snappy or quick to anger)
- Depression
- Limited attention span

I also experienced fatigue and an inability to cope with certain situations, and finally it lead to not caring too much about anything. The whole process once I realised it was happening was very frustrating as well, because it stressed me out because I could not work as well as I use to.

Ways to cope/prevent:
- Excercise
- Ensure that you take time for yourself
- Take your R&R (or vacation) on time!!!
- Confide in a trusted friend or look into getting a life coach

And because the above may not be possible, make sure you take time out between postings. A good suggested amount is about 3 months.

I am fortunate to work for an organisation that provides free counselling services, not only in emergencies. Through talking with someone I learned that what I was experiencing in my line of work was normal, and to not beat myself up for how I was feeling, or even my performance level.

Many organisations understand that people need time off in between posts. It is easy as someone just starting out to feel like you need to continuously work otherwise you may not get another job. However, in a lot of cases this is not the case. It is in the NGOs interest to promote breaks in between posts so that people taking up new jobs are fresh and able to perform well. It is also in the NGOs interest to retain good staff.

It is common to take time off and still stay within the same organisation (but you can also move if you need to).

I'm not sure when my burnout happened exactly. Probably the day after my last post. I should have seen all the signs coming. But those are famous last words. I have decide to take my advice and take some time off (about 3 months) - spending time sleeping, learning, seeing friends and family and chilling out.

Happy Happy Holidays!

It's CrazyEndOfGrant period here, so I have not had time to eat vegetables let alone write for fun!

Christmas this year coincided with the Shia’ festival of Ashura. It is the commemoration of the death of the Imam Hussein, a grandson of the Prophet Mohammed. Hundreds of thousands of pilgrims make their way to the holy city of Karbala to pay homage to the Imam. Some even practice “bloodletting” which can include whipping oneself. But while the rest of the country was on high alert with the clash of religious festivals, up north in Sunni Kurdistan (did you catch that play on words) Christmas was in full swing. For a predominantly Muslim region, the love of Santa Clause or “Baba Noel” (commonly pictured with a saxophone?) is unparallel. If coke was to launch its santa clause ad campaign in July it would be a hit.

In downtown Erbil the Citadel was lit up in lights and the street were lined with Baba Noel. This was times 10 in Ainkawa, the Christian suburb where I work. The village has lights strung up every square inch, and each church (there’s about one every two blocks – complete with services in Aramaic!) was transformed into what resembled Pagodas. I wish I could say that it was all very tasteful, but they only sell lights strings here that have two settings – blinking and seizure inducing. The default is seizure inducing.

As for activities a bit closer to home, there is actually a lot of “us” aidworkers sticking around for the holiday season. Most people are on a rotation, and only so many people are allowed to be out of the country at one time. The predominant force behind our Christmas celebrations was the International Committee of the Red Cross who mandated themselves to be the party organizers – with the bulk of the activity occurring on Christmas eve. Members of my household had to negotiate a Christmas day lunch into the agenda before the Swiss ran away with the fun.

Despite it being over 15C outside, we had a fantastically normal Christmas Eve cocktail party with presents and a proper, albeit late, Christmas lunch the following day. I even made mince pies and pfeffernuessen. Boxing day involved obligatory leftovers and a day full of James Bond. So it wasn’t too far off a regular Christmas in southern Ontario. Although it would still have been much better if I were at home.

Now to continue celebrations this week, I will be heading to Beirut and Damascus (finally!) for the New Year. And I will be “home” (o.k. Vancouver… but same country) in February.

I hope that everyone had a lovely holiday. They slept a lot and ate more. I also wish you all the best for 2010.

This one's for the girls

The New York Times (and I want to say CARE - their ads are all over the thing!) is running a special called "Saving the World's Women". Not so sure of the title ("save us oh male knight in shining armour"), it is just a tad condenscending. Women can help in their own "saving". However, despite this, it highlights the importance of women in the world, the disadvantages they face, and how our involvement and equality is better for everyone. (Plans for global takeover was not discussed... mainly because its planned for when you least expect it).

Anyways - you can find the articles on the NYT website:
The Women's Crusade

Afghan School Girls vs. Jihadists

The Disappearing Girls Effect
Hillary Clinton's New Foreign Policy Agenda
And finally and interview with everyone's favourite female President, Ellen Johnson Sirleaf

Gaining acceptance vs. Getting kidnapped

There's an article today on Reuters Alertnet (Reuters news source for those who care about humanitarian causes that is a bit more edgier that IRIN - I follow their "tweets"... I am a dork) that reviews that dangers of providing humanitarian in conflict and recent post-conflict societies.

Aid workers all know their environment is changing - at least I hope most do - and our families always assumed it was worse than what it actually is. Until now (duh-duh-duuuuuh).

It's been reported that aid workers in the Horn and Central Africa are being robbed weekly and that kidnappings all around have increased.

"Humanitarian workers are seen as rich people in places where most of the population is poor," said Philippe Adapoe, the Country Director of the International Rescue Committee (IRC) in Chad.

"In general aggressors target assets and money and we have visible assets such as cars, satellite phones, money and laptops."

Additionally, we can often be seen as collaborators with the "enemy" - as seen in places like Iraq and Afghanistan.

Anyways - it's pretty interesting to read the article - (here!) And interesting to note that one method of protecting aid workers is to become more accepted in the community. In my case here in Iraq - aid workers have been doing the opposite. Until recently only a few were operating low profile in communities - most (including my own) are/were working remotely from the north or neighbouring country or high profile behind compounds and security companies. Doing this associates us with immediate relief and money - and makes us seem superficial. Acceptance requires us to be in the communities, building relationships and understanding of the work we do.

Medivac experience (I have a blog?)

So sorry for the delays. I haven't been posting because a) I burnt my right arm to a crisp and b) I then went on a computer-free vacation (much needed). Amazed by the ability of the human body to heal, I am now back to typing in a mere 4 weeks and have almost full motion of my hand.

So what happened. An IED? Insurgent firefight? After all I am in Iraq.

Well friends, I was in fact attacked... by a flame-throwing oven. All I wanted to do was bake some eggplant. A gas leak had filled up the stove with gas whilst I was cooking lentils on top of the stove. When I went to "turn on the gas" for the oven and "safely" light it with the barbecue lighter... KABOOM!

2nd/3rd degree burns on my hand and lower arm and a medical evacuation to Amman (although not on the cool medical planes... just on RJ).

I learned a few valuable lessons from this experience:

1) Where protective goggles whilst cooking
I was lucky enough to have been wearing my glasses when it happened. I lost all the hair on my face, and some on my head (not like MJ). Had I not had glasses I would have no eyebrows or eyelashes (managed to preseve those... phew). I think from now on I may wear my fire-retardent gloves too....

2) Always carry a satelite phone
Normally Iraq has semi-decent cell phone service. But then there are the days that the Vice President of the United States is speaking at the convention centre next to your house. Warlocks on the enire area jam cell phone signals, aking it impossible to use them in the even of an emergency. Fun.

We have a few satelite and sets that would link up in this event - but we couldn't find them so my roommate and I just ran out of the house screaming instead.

3) Occasionally be thankful you live in cushy ex-pat-ville
Screaming did not last for long as we realised that our cush sub-division had a fully western, fully operational private medical centre a block down. Complete with very good looking EMT-Practitioner that administers very "beautiful" (to quote my jordanian doctor) drugs.

4) When in doubt always assume the ambulance is for you and not for victims of swine flu
When mdeically evacuated, they pic you up in an ambulance. I am not sure it was fully needed in my case. My boss/emergency escort and I made the assumption that it was for something else when we approached it, and there staff were not there. So we went and had a coffee. It was for me and the staff had been wandering around the airport trying to find the "burn victim".

So when medivaced - yes the ambulance is for you, unless you want an excuse for a coffee break.

Happy U.S. Troop Pull-Out Day!

In the event of the US Army withdrawing from urban centres (there will still be 130,000 in the country), the governments in both Iraq proper and the KRG have called... of course... and official holiday! For those places south of Erbil, Dohuk and Sulaimaniyah, yes - this is a good move. Security wise, its good to have people at home with their families... up in the three northern governorates...

The organization I work for has a pretty strict policy on holidays. This came about because some countries have a tendancy to have a lot of them. Often impromptu. Iraq is no different. Because of this, my current organization gives 15 pre-determined days a year that staff can have as holidays. Anything extra is evaluated, but usually not granted.

I was working for another organization previously here in Iraq, and I can see why the 15 day rule is useful. In December of 2008 and 8, because of a combination of pre-determined holidays and impromptu holidays, I think my staff worked a total of 8 days the entire month. A little ridiculous. Between the KRG and the GOI, and many last-minute declared holidays (often the day before - with a phone call at 4pm from the Operations Manager saying - the government says there is a holiday tomorrow so we are not coming to work), which of course you need to give to staff in both areas, actual work can go a little slow.

Now in this case, my current organization has granted the holiday for June 30th. But only for staff in the central regions (Baghdad, Anbar and Babylon) as a security precaution. We don't want people travelling around cities when we do not know what is going to happen. Our staff in Baghdad already has already faced difficulties working over that last two weeks because of all of the insecurities in the central region. We haven't, however, given the holiday to the northern staff. We'll see what morale is like in the office.

As for the pullout (or more appropriate "pullback"). On va voir!

For more on the US troop pull-out:
Washington post: Jubiliation in Iraq on Eve of US Pullback
NYTs: US leaves Iraqi Districts where anger still lingers

Do no harm?

Arg. There are certain principles that we (the collective we of aid workers) need to live and act by. Below is the ICRC Humanitarian Code of Conduct, signed by pretty, much every major NGO has signed up to:

ICRC Humanitarian Code of Conduct


I put this up because I have dealt with two episode this week that reflect a flaunting of these principles. One major... one a bit more minor.

1) Major - the SPOT
Good old US gov trying to get aid agencies to tell the military in Iraq where we're working (GPS location), who are staff are (?!?!?), if any major events happen in the area, and whether we have to evacuate or not (?!?!). It will become a requirement for anyone signing a US grant.

It's suppose to be for security - which in theory you may think - hey! having the military know where you're working may not be a bad thing... which in general... it's not. But staff names? numbers? exact locations? if there is a security incident? What happens if there is an incident - you report, then the military carries out an operation directly afterwards. Then community x goes... those NGOs are all working with the occupiers... lets make their life hell.

The blurring of military and aid work is a serious issue that will make any humanitarian work more difficult in any volatile country - having an even bigger impact on those most vulnerable. Let's hope this doesn't happen...

2) More minor but with a big impact...
One of my friends on facebook has joined one of those - click and feed a child groups. I was drawn to this because the profile pic of the group is a horrid image of an emaciated child near death. Now... I'm not an expert, but I'm thinking that's nearing 80's World Vision infomercial exploitation levels of target beneficiaries. Something any humanitarian knows... i hope... is a no-no. We pledge that we're suppose to use any images of our beneficiaries that are exploitative - they should depict resilience and respect the dignity of humans.

I was going to let the thing go, but I opened up the group and saw that it had 3 MILLION MEMBERS!!!! I had to write something to the group organizer - saying I thought the picture he chose was exploitative, and I respect his cause, but its promotion wasn't done in a very dignified way. He actual wrote back - but stated that all pictures were posted to show the state of the problem around the world - which may be - but there are only a few pictures posted... and they are all by him... and they are all exploitative. He can also monitor and remove any exploitative photos as the moderator of the group. What is more... I was referring mainly to the profile picture, something he has put up.

I'm very skeptical of these click and food goes to hungry child sites anyways - i think it's pretty dubious (where do they get this food/money from the click?). Moreover, I have mixed feelings about food aid unless in the most extreme cases. But to display these photos to so many people makes the public think this is ok! To exploit people is ok!

It's not.

Not your typical disaster...

All of our staff from Baghdad had come up for a week long training. To celebrate the first time we had gotten all of the organisation's staff together for the first time, we went on a day-long excursion through the mountains north of Shaklawa (Erbil, KRG). It's beautiful up there – very mountainous, with lots of areas to picnic and hike. Erbil governorate being relatively safe allows you to travel pretty freely without any fears of roadside bombs or sketchy check-points, which gave our Baghdad staff freedom they would not normally have.

Here are two anecdotes from the trip.

The KRG approach to nature conservation: "Cover it in concrete and nothing will touch it"

Bekhan is one of my favourite places in the whole country because it is… well… absolutely fascinating. Bekhan has a large natural spring that spills into a giant waterfall. It's where most of the bottled water in the KRG comes from. They have built a treatment plant conveniently and directly beside the waterfall…

Surrounding the waterfall there is a picnic area where people can camp and eat. It's not your typical picnic area that you would find in many places. Instead, to preserve the waterfalls natural beauty, the government has covered the entire area with concrete. To boot, stalls up on stalls of shops selling Chinese junk and Turkish junk food have been opened up surrounding the entire picnic area, which is 3 floors and works it way up through the waterfall itself, connected by a series of very uneven and dangerous concrete steps. The area is completely covered with corrugated tin roofing, and plastic lawn chairs and tables scatter the area. What is more, the whole are has connecting "steams" of water from the spring that run through concrete channels. Due to a lack of garbage cans… and most patrons inability to throw anything in one most of these streams are filled wit refuse from picnics and snacks. It's truly an amazing site/sight.

Theme parks… Yes I said Theme park.

As I was speeding down a hillside on a rollercoaster I thought to myself… maybe this isn't the best idea I've had in while. I have been on some scary midway rides before at less than well maintained community fun fairs before, but a rollercoaster at a theme park in the developing world? In a war zone no less? Then it hit me, the irony of it all. In one of the most dangerous countries in the world, I may fall to my death or be seriously injured not by a suicide bomber or an ambush, but in fact, a carnival ride. The news papers back home would write: "Canadian female, 26, seriously injured in Iraq on midway ride". Instead of sympathy, that maybe my family deserves more than me, we would get: "It serves her right… what the heck was she doing on a rollercoaster in Iraq?" This turned my minute-long joy-ride into a thrill-ride of sorts.

All in All – I clearly made it out alive. To report, the Bumper Cars were more fun, the rollercoaster wasn't really a rollercoaster per say, it was cars on tracks that went down a spiral on the side of mountain – and I must say looked fairly well maintained. I didn't touch the Ferris Wheel though. I had to draw the line somewhere.