Last Resorts

The New York Times has a story and a video journal on self-immolation of women in Afghanistan. It is a contribution to raising awareness to the despair women face by the lack of options everywhere. Forced marriage, sexual, gender and domestic violence/abuse and little to no options to leave unsafe situations safely or to seek counselling because of cultural taboos – compounded with a strict sense of honour linked with the behaviour of female family members - leads women to suicide (sometimes pre-empting their own honour killing). Women identify their limitations on movement outside the home limiting their suicide options. Women also believe that burning is an instant death – an assumption that leaves many with extremely painful, disfiguring but non-fatal burns.

The authors speak to this phenomenon being highest in some areas of Afghanistan in close proximity to Iran (where the practice is also common). However it is not only common to this region. I have been exposed to this in Kurdistan, Jordan and the occupied Palestinian Territories, and know of its commonality across the Middle East (and further afield). Women choose this method because it can be attributed to a “cooking accident” saving face for family members. More alarmingly however is the practice of burning as a method of honour killings – much for the same reason and particularly where states have made judicial progress towards persecuting perpetrators of honour killings. It is easier to hide from investigation.

I think the most disturbing story I heard, while in the Jordan Valley, was of a woman who had gone to the toilet in an outhouse. While she was in there, her family members threw in kerosene and a lit match from a small vent into the confined space and burned her alive. The women I spoke with said that this was not the first time in their community this method had been used. These stories point to a greater need to integrate counselling into programs in women friendly spaces and to improve community liaison to lift taboos associated with talking about gender based violence and depression. Moreover, international development partners and states need to encourage a holistic approach to protection of women and girls – not only through judicial and security reform – but also through involvement in health, education programs and community/state building throughout the process. There needs to be recognition that as states progress to greater gender equality and to protecting the rights of women and girls the threats facing them may change.

A great person to follow on this is Rana Husseini and the team at the Jordan Times that have worked tirelessly to remove the leniency in Jordanian law towards honour killings and further afield. No Honour in Crime follows Honour Killings as well [primarily Arabic].

The burn out...

Apparently my last post was on January 31 2010. Since then so many things have happened. Elections... (didn't care), Settlement Debacle in West Bank... (could have written a good post), Hiking Club in Kurdistan... (meh... it's fun).

Finally something did prompt me - its what I would call... the burn-out.

I wikipediaed burnout. I wikipedia everything. It states that "burnout is a psychological term for the experience of long-term exhaustion and diminished interest." This pretty much explains my general state for the past 2 months - possibly longer.

I think, well I know, it's an affliction that hits many people in the aid field (and probably a lot of other professions). A common complaint that is heard is how understaffed projects and offices are by NGOs, the one I work for is no exception. There is too much work, and in a lot of cases insufficient capacity to conduct high level programming that is expected of international NGOs and international organisations. This leads to staff who are consistently overworked with no end in site. A co-worker of mine calls it "Emergency Mode".

Although "Emergency Mode" compounded with a harsh environment may make matters worse, this affliction transcends location and even context. Because aid workers (and development workers) work in Emergency Mode all the time... Even when there isn't an emergency.

Iraq has many needs, and there are the occasional emergencies that pop up. The fact is however, it is no longer an Emergency Context (I’m sure people will debate that - but I stick by it). Large amounts of people are not in need en masse of direct and immediate humanitarian assistance. Particularly not in the KRG where I am based.

I have never worked in an actual emergency context where emergency mode is acceptable. I'm not sure if an emergency context makes emergency mode easier to sustain? However I do know that it is not sustainable in an non-emergency context. I'm proof.

Signs of burnout:
- Neglecting needs and interests
- Withdrawal from social activities (or in some cases acting out through social activities... often negative ones)
- Denial
- Change in behaviour (such as becoming snappy or quick to anger)
- Depression
- Limited attention span

I also experienced fatigue and an inability to cope with certain situations, and finally it lead to not caring too much about anything. The whole process once I realised it was happening was very frustrating as well, because it stressed me out because I could not work as well as I use to.

Ways to cope/prevent:
- Excercise
- Ensure that you take time for yourself
- Take your R&R (or vacation) on time!!!
- Confide in a trusted friend or look into getting a life coach

And because the above may not be possible, make sure you take time out between postings. A good suggested amount is about 3 months.

I am fortunate to work for an organisation that provides free counselling services, not only in emergencies. Through talking with someone I learned that what I was experiencing in my line of work was normal, and to not beat myself up for how I was feeling, or even my performance level.

Many organisations understand that people need time off in between posts. It is easy as someone just starting out to feel like you need to continuously work otherwise you may not get another job. However, in a lot of cases this is not the case. It is in the NGOs interest to promote breaks in between posts so that people taking up new jobs are fresh and able to perform well. It is also in the NGOs interest to retain good staff.

It is common to take time off and still stay within the same organisation (but you can also move if you need to).

I'm not sure when my burnout happened exactly. Probably the day after my last post. I should have seen all the signs coming. But those are famous last words. I have decide to take my advice and take some time off (about 3 months) - spending time sleeping, learning, seeing friends and family and chilling out.